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If I were a rich man

Page history last edited by John Hickman 12 years, 5 months ago

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jJ_-CmwHWPo

 

(SPOKEN:) Dear Phil, you made many, many poor people. I realize, of course, that
it's no great shame to be poor... but it's no great honor, either. So what would have
been the difference if I had... a small fortune?


If I were a rich man,
DeeBee DeeEm DeeBee DeeEm
DeeBee DeeBee DeeBee Em
All day long I'd DeeBee-DeeEm-bum
If I were a wealthy man.
I wouldn't have to work hard,
DeeBee DeeEm DeeBee DeeEm
DeeBee DeeBee DeeBee Em
If I were a biddy-biddy rich,
DeeBee DeeEm DeeBee daidle man.


I'd build a big tall army with Knights by the dozen
Right in the middle of the club,
A fine tin Knight with real wooden lances below.
There would be one long column just going up
And one even longer coming down,
And one more leading nowhere, just for show.


I'd fill my army with baggage and psiloi and horde
And spear for the club to see and hear,
Squawking just as noisily as they can,
And each loud "pa-pa-geeee! pa-pa-gaack! pa-pa-geeee! pa-pa-gaack!"
Would land like a trumpet on the ear,
As if to say, "Here lives a wargaming man."
Oy!


If I were a rich man,
DeeBee DeeEm DeeBee DeeEm
DeeBee DeeBee DeeBee Em
All day long I'd biddy-biddy-bum
If I were a wealthy man.
I wouldn't have to work hard,
DeeBee DeeEm DeeBee DeeEm
DeeBee DeeBee DeeBee Em
If I were a biddy-biddy rich,
DeeBee DeeEm DeeBee daidle man.


I see my wife, my Umpire, looking like a rich man's wife,
With a proper double chin,
Supervising comps to her heart's delight.
I see her putting on airs and strutting like a peacock,
Oy! What a happy mood she's in,
Screaming at the players day and night.


The most important men in town will come to game with me--
They will ask me to advise them,
Like a Solomon the Wise--
"If you please, DBMM list?"--
"Pardon me, DBMM list?"--
Posing problems that would cross a player's eyes--
(chanting) Ya va voy, ya va voy voy vum...
And it won't make one bit of difference
If I answer right or wrong--
When you're rich, they think you really know.


If I were rich, I'd have the time that I lack
To sit at the game table and play,
And maybe have a seat by the Eastern wall,
And I'd discuss the learned books with the DBMM list
Seven hours every day--
That would be the sweetest thing of all...
Oy!


If I were a rich man,
DeeBee DeeEm DeeBee DeeEm
DeeBee DeeBee DeeBee Em
All day long I'd biddy-biddy-bum
If I were a wealthy man.
I wouldn't have to work hard,
DeeBee DeeEm DeeBee
DeeBee DeeEm DeeBee DeeBee dum
Phil who made the DB and the MM
You decreed I should be what I am--
Would it spoil some vast, eternal plan,
If I were a wealthy man?

 

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